The aim of life is to live, says Henry Miller.
“Strange as it may seem today to say, the aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware. In this state of god-like awareness one sings; in this realm the world exists as poem. No why or wherefore, no direction, no goal, no striving, no evolving.”
I don’t believe I understood such a kind of living was possible, as I transitioned from female to male. There was no other aim for me but to answer the question why. Why do you want to become a man? Why do you think you feel this way? Why do you want to have surgeries? Why do you want to start hormones?
Now long past The Time of the Questions, I believe it necessary for me to stop being the Grand Inquisitor of my remaining life. Why is no longer important. Living is what is important. And part of living, and the stopping of the why, is forgiving myself for my imperfect body, which, frankly, I perceive as a failure. If there is any tragedy in my life, it is not the grand inquisitors of my past, but rather I have become the Grand Inquisitor of my life.
The aim of life is to live…[n]o why or wherefore.